I just asked Noah if he knew what today was (we had talked about it a few days ago) he said "its the day we celebrate, right?" I have a smile on my face and monkey on my lap (SG had to put monkey down in order to shovel more food in her mouth!). I think Noah is completely right. As I put my Princess Strong shirt on I feel her all around.
Someone asked me when the hardest part of this was. Yesterday, since she died on a Sunday or today, the actual anniversary. The hardest part was last night, remembering all that we went through, all her body went through that night, remembering the tears and the prayers. But joy comes in the morning.
"For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime; weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning". Psalm 30:5
The morning Ellie died, I rejoiced. Cancer had taken her body, but God took away her pain. No more hospitals or yucky medicine. No more needles. No more sitting on the couch all day while everyone else played. No more fighting over food, no more getting sick. I'm sure people could say, "well God didn't have to give her cancer in the first place." You are right, but obviously there was a reason for it, there was a plan crafted before the beginning of the world. I can't change that. I can be grateful that He ended her suffering and through His son Jesus, he promised me that I can live with Ellie and Him forever.
So today we celebrate. We celebrate Ellie, we celebrate Jesus, we celebrate this gift we've been given. Cancer has made me a better person, it has made my family more compassionate. It has opened our eyes to a world we had know idea about. Cancer has made me better at my job. I listen better, I understand pain better, and I don't let little things bother me as much. Cancer has made me a better mom, I give more hugs and kisses, I take more pictures, I talk more. Cancer has made me a better wife. I try to share my feelings more, and not go to bed or say goodbye with anger in my heart. (I'm by no means perfect, but I'm so much more aware of just how precious life is!)
When a guest preacher, preached an entire sermon on this one verse, i knew it had to be shared!
"Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift!" 2 Cor 9:15
His gift to us was His son. And a promise that even though we lose loved ones here on earth, if we just accept His gift, we can spend eternity with them. We don't have to perform a million acts of service or sacrifice a cow. Its simple...
We can thank you enough for lifting us up in prayer this week. We have felt everyone of those prayers and are so grateful to have you all in our lives. Thank you for following this journey with us and being a part of our family. We love you!
Prayers, Praise and Pink